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First and foremost, I will let you bitches know I have been PMSing since 6 periods ago.  Apparently my Estrogen is elevated , and explains nothing to my gyne, except that it’s normal at my age to have on and off bleeding for 3 weeks of the month.  Also with that comes constant itching and lack of sleep and extra crispy anxiety! YEAH!!! Oh and a bill for $800 f*cking dollars to tell me this.  That being said, either every f*cking person annoys me, or I’m seeing the light finally how much most people are f*ckheads?

Perfect example here: As you know, we are very fond of our BITs.  We want them to grow, learn and of course experience all kinds of activities.  Gymnastics and dance are the main ones that we’ve stuck with.  Bitch1 has already made it crystal clear how much insanity comes with these places.  I wasn’t quite as aggravated about it until this past 6 months or so.  If you know me, I like to meet new people, hear about their lives even if don’t want to. I sit and  listen to others at times, although I really want to scratch their eyes out!  Why, because I’m a nice person deep down.  But as we all know from my past post on myself,  I can release my inner b*tch when needed.

I know, these moms are all like me just there for their kids and wanting to socialize.  OK, I get it, but why oh why, when I join any class lately, there are the moms that have been trapped in a time warp of some sort.  Once in a while I chat with a very cool chick that my BIT has been in preschool with.  She even knows about this site and turns out, she gets annoyed as sh*t too about craziness!!!

The new class that my BIT is in has a new couple of kids.  One of the moms just happens to sit on the other side usually.  She sees that the other few moms are reading or on their phones like me.  Well, this mom is like evil Florence Henderson on speed.  She will keep to herself for two minutes but never failing, the minute I do chat with someone, she actually shouts and butts in from the complete other side of the room!!! I even tried talking very soft to test this theory and that’s hard for me!  Doesn’t work!  Me and the cool mom have talked about the fact that another gym may be better for our girls when they are ready.  Guess who heard??? And twice already she has ran over and TOLD us, not asked if we wanted her to butt her ugly ass in, about  her experience with the other gyms.  OH and guess f*cking what?  Her daughter is actually over qualified for this level but she moved and this is her option right now…Whoopee-freaking-do!!!  My bit is awesome and talented too!  Will she be an Olympian? Probably not.  Just saying.  I really wanted to drop kick this attention seeking annoying *sshat and mention that she needs to STFU!  Or nicely as as I could, shouldv’e said calmly, “Wow your daughter is really going to move fast up the ladder here” or something.

Guess what… that’s not all!  Last week, she overheard me from across the room ,again, just mentioning in passing about how my bit’s fav leotard had a pen stain and always forget to pretreat.  The other mom had an answer!!! She really has ears like a predator for f*cks sake!   She plops on over and cuts us off mid sentence saying “Vinegar.”  That’s it? Just said that? One word?  We (cool mom and I) looked at each other like WTF? Not intrigued at all, and afraid to ask, I have no idea why I said “Oh, how does that work?”  She explained that she only uses ALL natural solutions and that BIT has allergies.  Vinegar gets out all stains! WOW thanks and smelly clothes too!  Well she knew I would say that. You guessed it!  Her answer is lemon in it of course but usually it comes out OK.  Then I said “You can throw in a bounce or something right?” Then, you guessed it?Dryer sheets are so bad for kids! Really? I’ll be damned!

No, I haven’t dropped kicked her yet, but there is still time in this session. It may happen next week, or the next time she opens her big f*cking mouth to give unasked for, unwanted, and boring, stupid f*cking advice. Only time, and my mood at any given moment will tell. Because truly, I could give a rat’s *ss about 100% of the sh*t that comes out of her mouth. That’s the truth. Have a kick *ss day, B*tches, and stay far, far away from the DMs…if you can.

Kisses xoxoxo